Personal Revelation - Easy? Hard?

I'm currently working on step 11 for the first time through. The key principle of step 11 is to "seek through prayer and meditation to know the Lord's will and to have the power to carry it out." While I'm still really early in this step, I've already had some great thoughts and experiences that I want to record for later reference.

First of all, my experience the other day at church. That was a humbling experience that God let me be a part of and I'm so grateful for it. Faithfully and courageously following through on feelings brings results.

Next: I've almost gone a full year without acting out, or even getting close to. Some days go by with ease, others are still a struggle. Yesterday was a struggle. I was quite down from the previous days difficulties and I had a ton of time by myself at home. I could tell on the drive home that it would be a hard afternoon, and it started off that way. As I felt the temptations come, I got on my knees and prayed and asked God what he would have me do. I had the feeling that I should watch a conference talk on personal revelation and seek God's will. Later in the evening I thought about my day and realized that I couldn't remember a single temptation after making that connection with God. What a blessing.

In addition to the above situation, the fact that I even realized the stronger temptations early on and realized that I should do something about it was a matter of revelation from the spirit. Before, I would constantly found myself going from point A to point B in a blur. Now the spirit warns me and encourages me to seek God's will to get out. What a blessing.

Also, I know that God always provides a way out of temptation when I ask Him. I have never failed when I pray during a temptation, ask God (sincerely) what to do, and do it with full intent. He always provides an escape. I am so grateful that I understand that principle and that I have been given many, many escapes.

Next, the goals I set. During the talk I watched yesterday, I realized that God has been trying to get me to set a more solid schedule for a few weeks now - I've just been too lazy to do it. Until this morning. I started this blog at 5:19 AM as part of my morning study and I'll finish it later. I have other things I'll do each morning. Here's the schedule: wake up at 5:00 AM. 30 min personal study, including 5 min of just prayer and meditation. 1 hour of test preparation. 30 min of fudge time, in case I want to wake up a bit later on a certain day, or if my wife wants to go running. I'm going to try it for at least a week and see how it goes. I pray God will support me in my efforts.

In this process, I've found that I all but forgot what it meant to receive personal revelation. As a missionary, it seemed to be at my fingertips whenever I needed it. Over time, that knowledge just faded into the abyss of unused knowledge that seems to be the majority of my brain. I'm glad to be getting it back.

The essence of step 11 is a lifetime commitment to seek guidance from God daily and obey His commandments  It seems so daunting - and I feel like I still really do not understand personal revelation. I frequently find myself giving in to pride, laziness, or doubt as I seek to know and follow God's will. But I've got a few experiences now in my recent memory that I can look back on. A light is starting to come on.