The other day I was on a recovery website and the question
was asked:
"When can one say that they are in recovery?"
If there is a direct 1-line answer to that question, I haven't thought of it. I'm sure one of you has... but I haven't. All I could think of are reasons why I feel I am currently living in recovery. I hope that one day I'll be able to say I am 'recovered'... but I am more inclined to believe that I will simply continue to make choices that allow me to live in recovery, and maybe one day far in the future my heart will be like those of the Lamanites and be completely changed without me realizing it (3 Ne 9:20). Anyway, an interesting topic. I pasted my response to the question below.
"Hey buddy, great question. Like you said, being in
recovery doesn't mean that you are recovered. It means that you are committed
to a new way of life in recovery from addiction through Christ. And your wife
is very correct - sobriety doesn't equal recovery. Your strength of recovery
will only be as strong as your relationship with Christ and degree of humility.
I feel that I am currently living in recovery for a few
reasons. I'm not saying this is the answer to your question, just a few
thoughts that I have on the matter.
1) I no longer lie or seek to hide my addiction. I am transparent
with my spouse and am not hiding anything. I am open with her about my
struggles and am not afraid to have the hard conversations.
2) I have found the way of life where I know that if I do
what I should be doing then I will not slip up. I'm not afraid of randomly
relapsing - I know that there will need to be a certain number of poor
decisions that will lead up to it. I am committed to this new life and do not
see 'getting past addiction' as a U-turn or something to get past and then go
back to my old way of life. I seek God's will and do what i can to follow it.
3) I no longer dabble. I don't try to go to a certain line
and then go back. I don't mess with limits. I don't justify lesser forms of
acting out.
4) I no longer think "I've got this." I know I
don't got this. The moment I think I've got this is the moment I'm in danger. I
have accepted that I'm powerless over this without God. I need Him to help me
maintain my new way of life.
Anyway, those are things that help me feel I am in recovery.
Like you said, it's a lifelong thing and I am always just a few stupid
decisions away from not being in recovery, but you get the point. I pray I can
stay in recovery and continue on the road I am on."
Anyway, I was just curious what everyone else thought about being in recovery and what it means and when you feel like you are living in recovery. And it's difference from saying that you are "recovered." I'm sure there are things that I am missing that I could learn from your experiences that I could then apply to my own recovery repertoire.
This is a really great reminder. I need to examine if I'm touching the line or dabbling. I really like all your points, they are true! So I can't add anything. Sorry. :)
ReplyDeleteI really like this post. I think your definition of living in recovery is spot on. I don't have anything to add to it, partly because I'm not sure if I'm truly in recovery yet (I've got a little bit of sobriety now, but I agree that sobriety doesn't equal recovery). But I know recovery when I see it, and you've got a good hold on it. Keep moving forward.
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